A Story

When I read blogs, I like to know the person who is writing to me daily-ish. So today, I want to tell you a story.

About 6 months before I turned 16, I went to the doctors for an annual check up. My dad was with me and was standing behind me when I got on the scale. It read 178 lbs. When you take into consideration that I am 5 foot 1 and a half on a good day, well according to the BMI chart… I was obese. It scared the sh*t out of me. All of my aunt’s and uncle’s struggle with their weight, both on my mom AND dad’s side.

The next morning, I made it my mission to drink 6 bottles of water that day. Trading in lunch as subway for a cheaper lunch of salad at school and all the extra quarters went to water bottles. A few weeks later, I started walking up a half hour yearly 3 days a week to do a Pilates dvd. As well as cut my dinner portions in half. By late February, I started walking 3 miles everyday. I would get home from school, do my homework, watch a little tv – and play with some 3lb dumbbells, eat dinner then go walk. It became a habit and my quiet time. And if I’m honest with myself… I still to this day prefer walking or running.

By late March, I had lost around 40 pounds, give or take a few. And I felt amazing. Everyone around me noticed, and it made me respect myself more. I would be happy to get up a little bit earlier in the mornings to get ready for school, I was more involved in school activities and just happy all around.

And because what I changed was a lifestyle and not just some diet, for the next 2 years I not only kept off the weight but lost another 20 pounds.

Now please don’t miss-understand me… I have been tainted since. In the last 6 years I have put some weight back on and tried every diet in the book. It has caused a bit of a yo-yo affect and now that there is a sparkly ring on my finger and a move in the future (more on that next week), lifestyle is my focus. I’m actually reading a great book right now that is somewhat cheesy but all about adapting the lifestyle attributes of other cultures that have woman healthy, beautiful and healthy well into the 80s.

Anyways, this journey of mine, this space on the internet… it doesn’t come easy to me. It is an ongoing struggle. Mainly because I LOVE food, ask my fiance! Other than black licorice, we have yet to figure out what food I dislike. But that’s ok – the struggle part, not the black licorice. Our struggles are good as long as we don’t give up on them.

A number on the scale doesn’t determine who you are in life. Being skinny doesn’t guarantee you health. Wearing a certain size pants doesn’t make you weak or strong. What makes you healthy, beautiful and strong is your ability to keep up with your struggles and overcome them mentally, emotionally and spiritually, then… you can overcome your physical struggles and reap all of the benefits.

Since that doctors appointment I told you about, my dad has been diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes, my mom has had gastric bypass surgery, so has my brother AND uncle. I can count 5 people in my family who are currently on diets, and my 87 year old grandmother just said yesterday that she wants to lose 7 pounds.

This doesn’t come easy to me, I work at it everyday. And that’s a good thing. In fact, I’d rather be someone who figured it out now, rather than someone who is struggling with it at 45 because “ever since menopause, well I just can’t keep weight off”.

I hope that helps you understand me and this space a little bit better.

And for the sake of accountability, this week I’m focusing on have a beautiful 5 small meal a day diet filled with fruit,veggies and protein so that at the end of the day, I can reward myself with something small. A long walk while the sun is setting, 3 ounces of wine, an hour to sip iced tea while sitting on the porch… taking the time to paint my nails or give myself a facial. I guess I’m learning that you don’t have to indulge if you enjoy small things daily.

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2 thoughts on “A Story

  1. “I guess I’m learning that you don’t have to indulge if you enjoy small things daily.”

    Sweetie you do not have to do anything to make yourself feel good. You are a beautiful girl and the fact that you take time out of your life to make yourself better is all that counts. You give your readers a fresh light on this subject and the fact that you get personal makes it real. I would love to trade places with you as I am currently overweight by 150 pounds heavier than I should be.
    So trust me, there is always worse out there. Keep up the good attitude though.

    Looking forward to reading some more positive posts from you.

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